THIS GIRL IS ON FIREEEE!!!

MOOD: ;)

Wow, Semele is smoking! She is hot-to-trot!

Just thought i'd let you all know of another one of my love interests, I know how everyone loves to hear my latest crush....or partner.... hehehehe....whichever you prefer ;)

~ Zues xx

Hungry For Something Else!

MOOD: Grrrrr! ;)

Just met the lovely Io... now SHE is something ELSE!!
She invited me back to hers later (she cant come to mine for obvious reasons: wife and the fact my place just happens to be the realm of the gods)....
Unfortunately, I think Hera is getting a bit suspicious....so I actually turned Io INTO SOMETHING ELSE....a heifer... you know, I thought id mix it up a little.... and she still has the most beautiful eyes! :)

Heheheheheeee.... so I'll cya later baby! Hera never has to know! ;)

ILY BABE!

~ Zeus xx

Lovely Leto!

MOOD: Happy!!!!

A bit of a while ago now I saw the most lovely and beautiful woman ever! I was totally in a trance, and so I said to her "Oh lovely little Leto, will you be mine!" and so I told her just how beautiful she was, to which she replied "oh no, im very plain really, it just the light...honest"

And so I sang to her, What Makes You Beautiful by my all time fav band!! Its her fav band too.... though she seemed a little surprised when I said how much I loved 1D...im not quite sure why though...

 

 

...I totally rocked the song! I did think about Im Sexy And I Know It by LMFAO, or Tonight Im Loving You by the most attractive man with the hardest name in the world to spell (so lets just spell his name enruierquay eglashicious just to make sure it is completely wrong...) ...  but I felt these songs wouldn't have had the same effect....

 

Anyway, I just found out that she's having twins!!!! Only one encounter, man am I good ;)

 

heheheheheheheeeeee

 

~ Zeus xx



Hercules the MOVIE???

MOOD: OFFENDED

OMG, I just watched that atrocious Disney movie!! WTF!!! I do NOT LOOK LIKE THIS:

I think we all know that I REALLY look like this:

 

And Hera and I are most definitely not HAPPILY married...in fact, I think this image is a good representation of where we are at...

 

Yeah, im totally offended by this....and confused!! Where the hell did anyone get these untruths from! Urgh, if I didn't know any better, I would seriously think their reasoning was commercialism with underlying 'cotton-wool-society' values... sheesh....

~ Zeus xx

 

BALL AND CHAIN AND TORMENT!!!

MOOD: Frustrated

OMG, my wife Hera is so unfair... she is really, holding me back! im a TOTAL hit with the ladies, and she's all like "blah blah blah, you know my connection with marriage...blah blah blah im your wife....grouch grouch grouch stay away from those women, or there will be dire consequences!"
Pfft, im the KING OF ALL, MASTER OF THE UNIVERSE! I Cant do whatever I like, with WHOever I like.....urgh....

Darn wench....

....although....what she doesn't know wont kill her... ;) ...righhhhhttt?? heheheheheheeee ;)

~ Zeus, now optimistically sexual ;) hehe xx

DOUBLE BIRTH!!!!!!!!

MOOD: ??

Well, im not sure how to start with this one....so I guess ill start from the beginning....lol
Ok, so, I got a new wife...
She then had a child....BY HERSELF! And because it was ALL HER, well, to put it nicely IT WAS HIDEOUS!!! So as soon as she named the disgusting thing, Hephaestus, she threw it off Olympus in her shame!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA

Then, the weirdest thing happened, my head started hurting even more, and it almost felt like there was something in there trying to escape, so, I said to Hephaestus; "You may return to Olympus if you crack open my skull to let out the source of the throbbing pain!"

And, well, it actually worked!! ahahahahaha!! the pain is GONE!! Being a natural blacksmith, he totally spilt open my head and out popped my BEAUTIFUL daughter, the goddess of wisdom and war!!

I haven't quite decided what to name her yet though, as I cant consult her mother Metis for obvious reasons (lol) but im tossing up between Athena, Athene, Tritogeneia and Atrytone....

So, at the end of the day:
Have a child without me = abomination
Have a child with me = perfection

Heheheheheheeeee, I totally gave birth out of my head!!

~ Zeus xx

NEW WIFE!!

MOOD: Content

 


Well, after my first marriage didn't go so well, I decided to look a little closer to home...actually, A LOT closer to home...

So, id like you to meet, my NEW WIFE, Hera!!!! ...who also happens to be my sister...hmmm...not to worry....
 














Don't we just look so happy together....
 
And yes, it is kinda awkward....
 
At least she's attractive!
















~ Zeus xx